It is estimated that about 10 percent of Americans have tried a form of polyamory at some point in their life. If you are one of those individuals or if you are considering being one please know that I welcome all types of relationships in my practice. I am here to support you in whatever way you choose to engage with romantic or sexual partners. Non-monogamy has always been part of the human experience. Today, we have more vocabulary and a better understanding of the multitude of ways that people partake in some form of non-monogamous sex or love. Borrowing the list below from a Pollen article, please take a look if you are curious:
Polyamory. Generally defined as “many loves,” polyamory usually applies to people seeking out multiple intimate relationships that may include sex, love, family building, community, and more.
Hierarchical polyam. This generally involves a couple who have established a “nested” or comingled relationship in terms of housing and finances, etc., and also engage in other intimate partnerships that are less nested in structure.
Relationship Anarchy. This relationship often eschews hierarchical conventions and seeks to maintain multiple relationships at whatever level they organically fit in a person’s life—whether that’s friendship, sexual, emotionally intimate, etc.
Solo Polyam. Often, someone who identifies as solo polyam will engage in relationships but consider their own self to be their primary or nested partner.
Swinging. Swinging is a specific subset of a sexual play lifestyle wherein couples, most often heterosexual couples, explore sexual experiences with others—but consider themselves the only ones in the intimate partnership.
Open relationship. This is another umbrella term similar to ENM, and can encompass any of the above, along with many other types of relationship structures as defined by the individuals in them.
If you find yourself in any of these terms or are contemplating what that might be like for you I am ready to hear you. As a therapist, I understand that happiness and enjoyment have many shapes and forms. I am also aware that jealousy, insecurity, breach of trust, uncertainty and fear of abandonment can be present both in monogamous and non-monogamous relationship styles. We can tackle those together in therapy if they come up.
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