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SEX AND INTIMACY CHALLENGES

young couple embracing and kissing

There is no judgment in couples sex therapy with me. I respect all the forms your sexuality takes, from vanilla practices to uncommon kinks and fetishes. Intimacy is a big part of our wellbeing and it is important to address issues when they arise. It isn't very helpful that today's society and culture are full of contradictory messages when it comes to sex, causing many couples to struggle. 

With my guidance, you can learn to talk to each other about intimacy in a way that makes you both feel safe, including the way to express your needs, and the appropriate way to react to your partner's requests.

 

 Intimacy and sex can fulfill both physical and emotional needs for you and your partner but the importance you place on the frequency or the way it is "supposed" to look can make you feel vulnerable and it can easily lead to big fights. Intimacy in a healthy relationship encompasses both emotional closeness and sexual connection. When sexual closeness is gone, both men and women experience loss. It can create a great divide in a relationship.

 

You can survive in a sexless marriage for a time but at some point it will lead to your relationship eroding. There is hardly anything more powerful than intimacy to make you feel extremely close and validated. On the flip side, we won't find many things that can hurt you as much as a partner with whom you were intimate. If you give up on intimacy your partner can't hurt you. Without intimacy, you have control. It is a solution albeit not an optimal one. Instead, we can focus on the stories you and your partner create or used to create when you were intimate and get back to being able to have both sex and intimacy. 

I don't subscribe to telling you to stop having sex for a while and focus on sensate touch or other ways of showing affection that don't lead to sex. That can sometimes be a temporary fix but it doesn't address the complexity of the individuals who are struggling to connect. Your inner parts are meeting your partner's parts which adds to this complexity of inner emotions, desires and vulnerability, all of which need to be tapped into in order to facilitate deep connectedness. It is important to address the parts that are triggered by their issues. Those parts are trying to protect us from hurt and trauma.

 

By getting to the root of the intimacy issues you can then connect deeper as a couple. Embark on the journey to a more harmonious relationship today. Contact me to schedule a consultation. Let's navigate the intricacies of intimacy needs together and start strengthening the bond that has been keeping you together. You both deserve it! 

Contact me

astonetherapist@gmail.com

I offer video sessions ONLY. 

Reach out via email or fill out the form so we can then schedule a free, no-obligations-whatsoever 20 min consultation on zoom where we meet and see what your main struggles are, what you would most like to change, and where I'll give you an overview of how I envision you and your partner getting to that new, healthier place that you both deserve. 

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